It must have been maybe three years ago, when simply everybody, especially offline media, started talking about the so-called Web 2.0 phenomenon, that I started to have difficulties with expressing myself properly online until I felt I had to become completely silent. I think I became so sick of coming across all this meaningless triviality both in words and in pictures (15-year olds camwhoring on MySpace etc.) that faced with this flood of trash I just didn’t want to be a part of it anymore and help increase the word pollution.

Now, I certainly haven’t been going online for serious business only. That’s what real life is largely all about, after all. The internet is mainly for keeping myself informed on the more fun stuff, for entertainment. It also used to be about communication, but somewhere along the way, as described above, I simply lost the ability to communicate online, in every form imaginable. This isn’t meant to sound dramatic in any way. It was just a natural process, I guess. And so I became an invisible internet user who didn’t make much noise, who only consumed quietly what the people I still cared about posted. The internet in small doses. That was enough for me.

Slowly but surely I want to start writing again, here and in other places, but I’ve tried to do that so many times and always failed in the end but… maybe this time will be different. I’m so used to doing my fangirling, my obsessing over the things that I appreciate on an academic, hence offline level now that just posting little things and quick notes online isn’t as easy as it used to be. There’s this huge wall that keeps me from finishing up stubs and sketches and finally publish them here because I guess I’m still hesitant when it comes to making noise, making myself visible.

(That said, I don’t think I’ll ever have a page on MySpace or Facebook.)